The Myth of Always Coping: Why It’s Okay to Fall Apart Sometimes

"You’re so strong.”

 “You always handle everything so well.”

 “I don’t know how you do it.”

You have heard it. Maybe you have even said it. And on the surface, it sounds like a compliment. But underneath those words lies a silent expectation, one that says you are not allowed to fall apart.

At Stone in My Boot, we have seen this myth up close ,in teachers, carers, mothers, partners, leaders, people who hold everything and everyone together, often at the cost of themselves. This blog is for you, the ones who cope because they have to, but are secretly longing for a moment where they don’t.

The Culture of Coping

We live in a world that praises resilience. We are told to keep calm and carry on, to push through, to bounce back quickly. But what is rarely acknowledged is that this relentless need to 

“always be okay”

can become its own kind of prison. When “coping” becomes your identity, there is no space for softness. No room for honesty. No time to breathe. Behind the smiles and schedules are people stretched thin, worn out and desperately needing a space to just be, not manage, not perform, not inspire, just exist as they are.

Image sourced from Pinterest

The Truth About Falling Apart

Here’s what no one tells you, falling apart isn't a weakness. It is wisdom.It’s the nervous system asking for rest.It’s the soul asking to be heard.It’s the body waving a white flag that says: 

“I’ve carried enough. Let me be held for once.”

Grief, overwhelm, burnout, exhaustion, these are not flaws to fix. They are signals. And when we ignore them in favour of “coping,” they grow louder. Falling apart, then, becomes the brave act of listening.

You Don’t Have to Hold It All Alone

This is why we create the spaces we do at Stone in My Boot. Not just to walk in nature aka our walking therapy retreats or in person counselling session. But to finally stop holding it all together. Our retreats are for the women who say “I’m fine” when they are anything but. For the teachers who never stop giving. For the men who have forgotten what it feels like to be cared for. These spaces are where you can cry without apology, rest without guilt, and be seen without needing to explain a thing.

Permission to Let Go

If you are reading this and feel something in your chest loosen, this is your permission slip.

You don’t have to cope today. You don’t have to hold everyone else. You don’t have to smile when you're tired. You get to unravel. You get to rest. You get to be a beautiful, messy, feeling human being, just as you are.

Want to Fall Apart Somewhere Safe?

Join us at our Walking Therapy Retreats or book an online therapy session  where no one expects you to “handle it all,” and everything is designed to help you breathe again.

Follow us on social (facebook/instagram/tiktok) to see more about upcoming Walking Therapy Retreats.

You don’t have to be strong here. You just have to be real.